By Don Jacobson
Unfortunately, divorce or the death of a parent can separate grandparents and grandchildren. Sometimes the ex-“child-in-law” is angry or never had that good a relationship with the ex-“parents-in-law” in the first place. Grandchild-grandparent relationships are not only good for both sides, but have some legal protection.
If, because of your child’s death or divorce, you have been “cut out” of your grandchild’s life, there are circumstances in which you can get a court order for “grandparent visitation.” The process is not particularly complicated, and you can do most of it yourself if you cannot afford a lawyer to help you. It is worthwhile to have a lawyer give you some guidance, even if you cannot afford to have the lawyer handle the entire matter.
The basic issue for the judge is whether seeing you is in your grandchild’s “best interests.” There are lots of considerations that go into that decision, and the mechanics (how often, when, where) will be part of the discussion and the decision.
You should try to get the “other side” to agree to something before going to court. Starting with something less than you want by agreement creates an opportunity for agreement to get more time as things progress. Save the fight for when it is necessary. The key issue is your relationship with your grandchild. When he or she is older (teens), that relationship will be much more under his or her control, and if it is good, the parent will have a lot less ability to interfere. If you have been able to work things out with the parent from time to time, you may find that the parent now values your relationship with the grandchild.
Still, if you have to fight, you can use the statute. You will file an affidavit telling the judge what you want, why, and why it is in your grandchild’s best interests. You will send a copy to the other side, and you can request a hearing if you want to present testimony in person. The judge will rule after both sides have had an opportunity to file affidavits, or after the hearing if someone has requested it or the judge decides that one is necessary. The process will likely take a couple of months without a hearing and longer if there is a hearing.
Don D. Jacobson, Esq.
Levin Jacobson Japha, PC
303-504-4242